Furuba In Wonderland
by Jennifer Lusk
Summary: Twisted version of Alice in Wonderland involving some of the cast of Fruits Basket.


Furuba In Wonderland  
  
AN: Here is my answer to Mona's AU dare. It took me a while due to other dares, Otakon, and me struggling with the beginning. Anyway. I hope it meets with everyone's standards.  
  
Warnings of OOC and Alternate Universe.. Disclaimer: I don't own them!  
  
Hatori sighed and watched the wind blow the branches of the tree. Standing, he walked out on his porch enjoying the day ending peacefully. He was about to go back inside when a blonde bunny streaked by shrieking. He leapt off the porch to try to help.  
  
Even though he had the advantage of long legs, the bunny was quicker. It dashed through a gap in the huge privacy fence surrounding Hatori's house. Hatori sucked in his already flat stomach and forced his way through, earning a small scrape on one cheek. The bunny was nowhere to be seen or heard.  
  
Sighing, Hatori sat down to think. Hatori stood up, about to go back through the fence when he heard a voice above him. "Looking for someone? I might can help for a price." Hatori looked up and saw a big black dog grinning down at him.  
  
'Something's not right here. Dog's can't climb trees much less talk.' Hatori looked around but there wasn't anyone or anything else around. He looked back up, but the dog was gone.  
  
Feeling something pressing into his thigh, he looked down slowly, feeling reality slide away as the dog's mouth moved in time to the words he heard. "Well, do you want my help?"  
  
Hatori sat back down with an audible thump. The dog waited expectantly. "You can talk?"  
  
"Hai."  
  
"Did you see a blonde rabbit run this way?" Hatori asked still reeling from the shock.  
  
"I saw a blonde boy with bunny ears run over that hill towards the forbidden lands." Said the dog as he grinned broadly again.  
  
"Forbidden lands?"  
  
"Hai. The King of Hearts rules there. It's not that it's forbidden to enter as much as it's forbidden to leave. Once you enter the king's lands, he'll never let you go."  
  
"You mentioned a price?" Hatori said as his mind finally began to process everything.  
  
"If you are going that way, I won't charge you. You'll need everything you've got just to survive." With that the dog began to fade into the shadows, his eyes and bright smile lingering a few seconds before vanishing as well.  
  
Hatori looked towards the hill then back at the fence. His conscience pressed heavily down on him as his mind was screaming, 'leave the loony area immediately!' Sighing Hatori turned and walked towards the hill. He had to try to help the bunny.  
  
After walking for hours and not getting any closer to the top of the hill, Hatori sat down to rest in a field that he didn't remember seeing when he began walking.  
  
"Lost are we?" Hatori jumped as he turned his head so fast his neck popped. He was face to face with a talking ox.  
  
"H-hai."  
  
"Where are you going?" Asked the ox in a lazy, relaxed voice.  
  
"The hill." Hatori began only to be interrupted.  
  
"The hill? My, my. The only way to climb that hill is by walking backwards. You do know that once you go over the other side, you can never return again, don't you?"  
  
Hatori nodded as he spoke, "The dog told me as much."  
  
"Ah, you met Shigure then. What did he charge you if you don't mind my asking?"  
  
"He didn't."  
  
The ox gaped at him.  
  
"Backwards, you said?"  
  
"Hai."  
  
"Thank you. I'll just be off then. Oh, did you happen to see a blonde bunny or boy with bunny ears run this way?" Hatori asked as he dusted off the seat of his pants.  
  
"He went over the hill."  
  
"Arigato." Hatori began to walk backwards up onto the steadily sloping ground. His thighs began to protest the weird exercise and he still hadn't reached the top. The ox continued to watch him. Hatori noticed a flash of light bounce off the ox's ears. The ox had pierced ears? How strange.  
  
"Or was it around the hill? I can't seem to recall." Mumbled the ox as he watched the man disappear over the hilltop.  
  
Hatori heaved a sigh of relief as the ground finally leveled out. He turned and began to walk down the other side of the hill. His legs were grateful to have him walking normally again. He walked through a small grove of trees and stopped seeing a clearing with a full dining set on a long formal table.  
  
Teapots randomly filled cups. Sugar dishes added sugar to some cups and not to others. Plates of cookies slid along depositing cookies on empty plates. At the head and foot of the table were two men with long hair wearing feminine clothing and about halfway up the table was a female in a maid outfit. One man had silver/white hair and the other had sandy blonde.  
  
Hatori watched silently as the trio gulped their tea, ate a cookie and moved to the next chair on the left. They moved up four chairs before Hatori was spotted. The white haired man rose and flounced towards Hatori.  
  
"Ah, it's so nice to have company! How I love the new ideas they bring! Come, come, you must sit down and have a spot of tea with us, right Mine, Ritsu?" Before Hatori, Ritsu, or Mine could say anything the doctor was escorted to an empty seat and served. The trio resumed their activities.  
  
"Drink up, you must keep moving you see. It's not a tea party without drinking." Hatori sipped his tea but was propelled into the next chair by the white haired man. After a few more stumbling tries, Hatori caught the frenetic pace and even managed to speak.  
  
"Have you two seen a blonde bunny or perhaps a boy with bunny ears run this way?" Set cup down, shuffle to next seat.  
  
"Ah, yes. He did dash through here. Wouldn't stay for tea or anything. Kept mumbling he was late for something." Shuffle to the left.  
  
"Could you direct me where he went?" Sip, munch, sip, and pause.  
  
"He went towards the castle." Shuffle to the left.  
  
"The castle?" Sip, munch, and sip.  
  
"It's to the west. If you walk for ten minutes, you'll soon come across a maze. The castle is at the heart of the maze. Watch out for Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum." Shuffle to the left.  
  
"Thank you very much. I must be off now. Good day sirs." Hatori rose and left. His stomach sloshed unpleasantly with his movements from the large quantity of tea he'd drunk.  
  
Hatori managed to walk eight of the ten minutes before he had to retreat to the bushes to answer nature's call. Tea never took long to run through his system and with the large amount he'd drunk, he was not surprised.  
  
Hatori was just stepping back onto the faint path when a voice by his thigh had him jumping. "Still haven't found the bunny boy? Tsk, tsk." The dog shook his head sadly while looking up at Hatori. "I bet you wasted your time with the ox and the Mad Hatter as well."  
  
"I spoke to an ox." Hatori replied slowly. "Mad Hatter?"  
  
"A man with long white hair. He's extremely fond of tea and tea parties. He usually has a woman and another longhaired man with him. They are all crazy as loons." The dog sighed and sat back on his haunches.  
  
"They told me about the maze and to watch out for Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum. I thought they were very helpful."  
  
"Okay. If you think so. Just yell for me if you get in a bind. I'll help you for a price." With that the dog again faded into the shadows, his eyes and teeth the last to disappear.  
  
"What a strange world this is. I must have banged my head somewhere. This has GOT to be a dream," Hatori mumbled as he continued to walk towards the approaching hedge maze. Hedge really couldn't do it justice. The maze was a good ten feet tall and so thick he couldn't see through it.  
  
Hatori slowly walked around the edges of the maze not finding the entrance. He sat down to rest for a minute as he thought.  
  
"Wow. You've already made it this far?" Hatori slowly turned and found the ox with pierced ears standing behind him. He slowly nodded the obvious answer. "Why haven't you entered yet?" Asked the ox as he met Hatori's eyes.  
  
"I can't find a way in." Hatori said simply. The ox nodded and looked down.  
  
"Did you find the bunny eared boy?" Asked the ox softly.  
  
"Not yet. The dog told me I wasted too much time with you and the Mad Hatter's group." Hatori looked down as he said this not wanting to see the ox's hurt expression.  
  
"He WOULD say that. He's the one that wastes time. He never tells anyone helpful without it serving his own purposes. If you ask me, I think he's in league with the King of Hearts. Ummm. You didn't hear that from me, Okay?"  
  
"Hai." Hatori answered softly, oddly drawn to the ox. Maybe it was the pierced ears. "Do you know how to enter the maze?" Hatori asked softly.  
  
"You have to wait on Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee to exit then go in after them. Don't let them see you or you'll suffer horribly." The ox shuddered as he spoke.  
  
"Thank you. Do you have a name? I can't just call you ox." Hatori said curious.  
  
"Hatsuharu. Most people just call me ushi though. I'm off." With that last comment, the ox turned and left, walking around the edges of the maze.  
  
Hatori sighed. So he just had to wait here for the Tweedle's to leave then enter where they came out. Sounded pretty simple. What did the Tweedle's look like? Hatori slapped his palm against his forehead. Why hadn't he thought to ask either Shigure or Hatsuharu while they were there?  
  
Hatori stood. Maybe if he hurried he could catch up to the ox before he'd gone too far. Hatori quickly set off in the direction Hatsuharu vanished in. After completely circling the maze twice and not seeing any sign of the ox, Hatori resumed his previous seat looking at the maze.  
  
He was about to stand up when he saw the maze part and two figures walk out. The maze remained open behind them. 'These two must be Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee.' Hatori thought as he remained where he was trying to be invisible with nothing to hide behind. The two seemed completely focused on themselves, much to Hatori's relief.  
  
"You stupid cat! Why can't you do anything right? You were supposed to detain the ushi not send him over the moon." The Tweedle with the light hair hissed at the redhead.  
  
"I tried to detain him! It's not my fault he turned black. You know there isn't any reasoning with him when he turns." Snarled the redhead. "Kuso nezumi!" He muttered in an undertone.  
  
Hatori watched amazed as the two continued to fight. He heard their words. Were they referring to the same ox he'd just spoken to? It would answer why he hadn't been able to find the ushi when he looked.  
  
Hatori stared as the two continued to argue. The redhead sprouted car ears and a tail, as he got madder with every installment to their argument. The two began to move out from the hedge as they continued to argue. As they disappeared down another path, Hatori dashed forward into the maze as the hedge closed behind him.  
  
Hatori sighed in relief. He slowly walked forward. He was on a straight path on the outside of the maze. He needed to go left to get to the center. Of course that would change as he got further in and the maze got trickier.  
  
He hadn't walked too long before he came to a left turn. He took it and continued to walk. He came to a small opening and paused hearing voices. He peeped inside trying to remain out of sight.  
  
Two girls dressed in formal kimonos were slowly dipping white finches in red dye. "Rin-chan, how could you have been so foolish as to purchase white finches? You know the King only likes the red ones."  
  
"But white was all they had, Kagura-chan." Kagura sighed and continued to dye the bird she held, careful to keep the liquid out of its eyes and beak. Rin probably had spent the day with the ushi instead of looking for the proper colored finches.  
  
Rin saw a movement out of the corner of her eye. "Who's there?" She called out.  
  
Hatori slowly stepped into the opening. He was embarrassed at being caught. "Just me. I'm harmless. I was looking for a blonde boy with rabbit ears or a blond usagi that might have came this way. Did you happen to see him?"  
  
The two girls exchanged a look. "Do you mean Momiji? Hai. He came through here about an hour ago." Kagura said softly.  
  
"Thank you. Can you tell me how to get to him from here?" Hatori asked.  
  
"Why do you want to know? It's not like you are a servant here or anything. You don't belong. Go home before you get stuck here too." Rin said as she glared at the intruder.  
  
"He was screaming in a panic when I saw him. I just want to help." Hatori answered as honestly as he could.  
  
Rin laughed in a bitter way. "We are beyond help. You should go back before you are too." Hatori watched, as her hair grew longer as her anger rose.  
  
"Careful, Rin-chan, you are showing you true colors." Kagura warned. At her words, Rin took a deep breath and released it slowly. Her hair slowly went back to its previous length.  
  
"What is going on here?" He asked softly. "I've met talking animals and seen people develop animal attributes."  
  
"It's just the way things are here." Kagura said simply. "If you must find Momiji, we'll take you there after we get through with the birds, but not before."  
  
"Kagura-chan!?!?" Rin exclaimed.  
  
Kagura just sent her a look. The two sat back down and resumed dying the bird's feathers. Hatori sat down beside them and picked up a white bird. He slowly dipped it into the dye. Kagura smiled her thanks. Rin snorted.  
  
"Why are we dying the birds?" Hatori asked. He'd heard their earlier discussion, but it still didn't make sense to him.  
  
"Because that is what the King wants. Red finches. No other kind will do. Rin-chan bought white so now, we must dye them."  
  
"But what happens when they get new feathers?" Hatori asked curiously.  
  
"Hopefully we will have replaced them before that happens." Kagura replied with a tired sigh.  
  
"What is the meaning of this?!?!?!?" Demanded a male voice. Kagura and Rin let out small 'eeps' as they bowed as low as they could. Hatori followed their example. "Well. Is anyone going to answer me?"  
  
"We were dyeing the birds red, Highness." Kagura replied, her voice muffled, as she remained bent over.  
  
"Why did you need to dye the birds? Why not just buy the red ones?" Asked the King in a deceptively calm voice.  
  
"Because all they had were white finches, not red, sire." Rin said hesitantly.  
  
"Who is responsible for this fiasco? They must be punished." Hatori could feel both girls shiver beside him. He couldn't stand to see what might happen to them.  
  
"I did it. It was my fault." Hatori said softly. He heard both girls gasp as he took the blame.  
  
"You. Look up. I don't think I know you." Said the King.  
  
Hatori slowly looked up and saw the King of Hearts for the first time. He noted the King's unusual pallor and thinness. "I don't believe we've met before, sire." Hatori responded calmly.  
  
"What is your animal?" The king demanded. Hatori just stared. His animal?  
  
"He is the hassenchi, sire." Kagura chimed, still bowing.  
  
"So you are the infamous dragon." The King began to laugh maniacally. "Yes, if I looked like you I think I would hide away most of the time as well. So pathetic, to be called a mighty dragon and only manage to turn into a seahorse. I shall forego your punishment because you have made me laugh. You won't be so lucky a second time."  
  
The King looked at the birds. Half were red and half were white. He smirked. "Leave the birds as is. They amuse me." With that he turned and left. Kagura and Rin slowly sat up exhaling soft sighs of relief.  
  
"Thank you." Kagura said bowing towards Hatori.  
  
"No, thank you. I had no idea what to say when he asked what animal. What did he mean?" Hatori asked curiously.  
  
"We, his closest servants can take animal form. Each person can take the form of a zodiac animal. The dragon is the only one the King has not yet found and enslaved. It's not his power but his curse. He cursed out family then hunted for each cursed member to wait on him. It's degrading. While he thinks the dragon has been found, he hasn't. We just tell the King that he's shy or busy or something when he's called for." Kagura answered.  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Well since we don't have to dye these stupid birds, let's get you to Momiji so I can go home." Rin said standing quickly and dusting off her kimono.  
  
"Okay." Hatori and Kagura stood as well. They had just picked up the dyeing supplies when the Tweedle's entered still fighting.  
  
Kagura squealed and leapt forward throwing her bucket of dye to one side. "KYO!!!" She exclaimed as she glomped onto the redhead.  
  
"GAH!!!" Screamed Kyo.  
  
"Baka neko." Muttered the other boy.  
  
"Yuki-kun." Said Rin with a nod.  
  
"Rin-chan." Replied Yuki returning the nod.  
  
"Umm. I thought you two were called the Tweedle's." Hatori said softly.  
  
Kyo and Yuki stared at him. "Who told you that?" They yelled as one.  
  
"Umm. the inu and the ushi."  
  
Kyo growled, "That damn brat!"  
  
Yuki muttered, "That pervert!"  
  
"So that isn't your names then?"  
  
"NO!!" Exclaimed the two as one.  
  
"Ah." Hatori said. Just as Hatori spoke, Ayame, Ritsu, and Mine entered the clearing. All three carried a teacup and saucer. They sipped their tea as they walked further in. The trio paused seeing the group already gathered.  
  
"Why it's a party in the making. We must have some cake!" Ayame said happily as he clapped his hands, dropping his cup in the process. Luckily the ground was soft enough it bounced instead of breaking.  
  
"Where shall we get cake?" Mine asked.  
  
"Momiji will know." Ritsu said.  
  
All three nodded happily before yelling as loud as they could. "MOMIJI!!!!!"  
  
With in minutes, a blonde boy appeared in the clearing. "Someone called?"  
  
"Yes, we need cake for a party. Where can we find some?" Ayame asked.  
  
Hatori glanced around the crowded clearing as his head whirled. This was too much for him to handle. He slowly sat down lowering his head between his knees as he took deep breaths to clear his mind and calm his whirling head.  
  
"Hatori-san, Hatori-san. Can you hear me? I think he's coming around." Hatori heard Tohru soft voice followed by a masculine murmur.  
  
Hatori slowly opened his eyes and looked up. He was in his room. Shigure was sitting on one side, Tohru on the other.  
  
Shigure smiled down in relief. "Glad to see you finally came to. That was quite a scare you gave us, Ha-san."  
  
Tohru smiled as well. "What happened?" Hatori asked softly. His head was aching.  
  
Shigure grinned at Tohru as he answered. "You walked in on Tohru changing and fell down, hitting your head on the counter."  
  
Hatori frowned. "Tohru changing?" He looked over and saw Tohru's blush.  
  
"Don't tell me you don't remember?" Shigure teased. "Tohru spilt some hot chocolate on her dress. I volunteered your clothes and place to change at. You weren't home at the time. I didn't here you enter through the back door. You walked in on Tohru changing."  
  
Hatori looked over and sure enough, Tohru was wearing some of his clothes. Thank Kami it was just a dream! 


End file.
